Getting your money back can take time, follow-ups and even third-party involvement.

Worried young African-American woman holding money while sitting at the table in the living room

On Reddit, a user recently asked how to request a refund without appearing rude.

There are many reasons to ask for a refund: You could have been overcharged by accident, changed your plans, or simply decided to return something because you want your money back.

Commenters were quick to encourage the questioner to confidently request refunds when they are justified without worrying too much about hurting anyone’s feelings.

But refunds don’t always come easily, even after making a formal request. So what’s the best way to escalate the refund request to increase the chance of success?

I asked some experts for the best techniques.

Check the merchant’s policies

Some retailers have become less flexible with their return policies, says Chuck Bell, programs director for advocacy at Consumer Reports. That’s partly because they’re watching their own bottom lines and trying to minimize fraudulent returns.

To make sure your refund request complies with the current policies, Bell suggests understanding what those policies are before buying.

“What’s tricky for consumers is that each company has different policies,” he says, adding that most people don’t bother checking the rules.

It’s also worth making sure you’re shopping at a legitimate company, says Claire Rosenzweig, president and CEO of the Better Business Bureau serving Metro New York. “If you purchase from what turns out to be a phony, misleading or deceptive website, your chances of getting a refund are close to zero,” she says.

The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) also suggests reviewing the company’s return policies, checking deadlines and collecting receipts to create a paper trail of your refund request. If your initial requests don’t get anywhere, then the FTC suggests escalating to a manager or supervisor.

Keep following up

Calling back, asking for the customer relations manager and writing a formal letter are all steps that can help get a company’s attention, Bell says. “Make the request clear and specific.”

Persistence is key, he adds. When Bell was falsely accused of smoking in a hotel room and hit with a $200 fee, he followed up multiple times before he eventually got a letter saying the hotel would refund the erroneous charge.

Rosenzweig suggests trying to reach a customer service agent over the phone, instead of relying on texts and chatbots. A real person might be more empowered to solve the problem, she says.

Don’t lose your cool, though. Stay calm and polite, and keep a record of your interactions.

Get help from your credit card issuer

After you’ve tried and failed to get a refund directly from the merchant, NerdWallet credit card expert Sara Rathner suggests initiating a chargeback through your credit card issuer.

In fact, this method worked for Rathner after a merchant promised her a refund but failed to follow through — and then stopped responding when she asked for updates.

“I successfully disputed the charge with my credit card and mentioned in the dispute that I tried to handle it directly with the merchant first,” she says.

Take the matter to a third party

If you still can’t get your money back, you can contact your state’s attorney general, a national consumer organization, the Better Business Bureau or the FTC. You could also share your complaint publicly on social media.

Just be careful, Bell warns: Going public can also make you a target for scammers. If someone reaches out to you offering to “help,” first verify their identity.

Still, he adds, large companies often monitor social media for complaints so it can be an effective way to get a refund if all other methods fail.

We hope the other methods work before you have to go “nuclear” on the socials.

Reddit is an online forum where users share their thoughts in “threads” on various topics. The popular site includes plenty of discussion on financial subjects like how to get refunds, so we sifted through Reddit forums to get a pulse check. People post anonymously, so we cannot confirm their individual experiences or circumstances.

Originally published on nerdwallet.com, part of the BLOX Digital Content Exchange.

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